


that heart in the night

by Anonymous



Category: Formula 1 RPF
Genre: Ambiguous/Open Ending, Angst, Break Up, Emotional Baggage, Hurt, Jos Verstappen's A+ Parenting, M/M, Miscommunication
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-30
Updated: 2020-12-30
Packaged: 2021-03-10 20:54:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 744
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28423524
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: "What if—what if we... I don't know. I just—could. Do you ever think," he tries, haltingly, all stops and starts. In a moment of bizarre clarity, he thinks of skipping a stone on the surface of a creek; the individual clicks of sound. Thinks of being nine years old again, infallible and sure of himself, in a way he hasn't been, not really, in a pretty long time.  "that maybe, if things were different, we could have—we would've worked?"Lewis looks at him like he's seeing him for the first time. "Yes, Seb, of course. Constantly. But what would we had to have given up to get there?"
Relationships: Lewis Hamilton/Sebastian Vettel
Comments: 10
Kudos: 10
Collections: Anonymous





	that heart in the night

**Author's Note:**

> title comes from dezaya's am i strange.

"it is so hard being bald," seb said, blinking his ocean blur orbs. "it makes gardening and tending to my chickens so painful when my scalp burns and flakes from uv rays."

"well, sebby," lewis responded, adjusting the drawstrings on his 3 trillion dollar sweat suit, "i am vegan and so sexy, so i cannot relate. but i do empathize, and hope that things get better for you ❤️."

"wow lewis, you awe so kind and thoughtful. unlike that disgusting twink charles leclerc. i cant believe he purposefully executed a scheme against me to kick me out of ferrari. if i wasnt gay myself i would be homophobic just because of his sickening presence in my life," seb said.

"well sebby," lewis responded, "i am a winner and so sexy, so i cannot relate. but i do empathize, and hope that things get better for you ❤️." 

without further ado, the two men shucked their clothes off and began to passionately make love. their tongues battles for dominace, and they thrusted against each other with heat and fervor the world has never seen. 

until things took a turn, that is.

"OW, LEWIS, YOUR HAND IN MY HAIR IS HURTING MY ALREADY FRAGILE SCALP!" seb said.

"oh, sorry guv," lewis said sexily, and took his hand out of sebastian's sparse locks... only to find that seb's hair came out when he moved his hand away. seb was now completely bald on the top of his head, with only a small and quite frankly sad to look at ring around his ears and the back of his head, almost like the short fat guy on seinfeld. 

"WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS?" seb asked when he felt his hair evacuate its home atop his dome. "WHY AM I BALDING? WHY HAVE MY EDGES BEEN SNATCHED THUSLY?" 

"i don't know, but i hope things get getter for you--OI BRUV, ARE YOU SHRINKING INNIT?" 

"what do you mean shwinking? do i look smallew to you fow some weason?" seb asked, then stopped, in shock. "why am i talking like a baby? whats happening? WHO IS DOING THIS TO ME?" he asked, to no one in particular. god, perhaps? 

"IT IS ME," an evil voice sounded from the darkness, "I HAVE DONE THIS."

"WHO????????" lewis asked, unable to take his eyes off of sab's rapidly shrinking form. if it kept up at this race, only seb's cerulean orbs would be recognizable! 

"ME, OF COURSE," the voice said, sounding closer now, but still not visible from the shadows. "seb's WORST enemy, the only person evil and genius enough to concoct this nefarious scheme.... heh heh heh."

seb gasped and it sounded like a baby's gasp. "wait... that voice! is that--"

"CHARLES MARC PERCIVAL HERVE LECLERC??????? WHY YES IT IS!" charles exclaimed, finally stepping into the light. he was wearing a dumb shitty outfit, one that was ugly but also sent a clear message that he was gay but not in a cool way in like a kurt from glee way. "MY SCHEMES ARE FINALLY COMPLETE! i needed you out of my way so that i could take over as the new face of ferrari! i bided my time and worked slowly, race by race, ensurjng that your car became worse and worse, making your pit stops slower and slower, all the while letting you win each and every hourglass challenge to throw you off the scent. AND NOW IT IS TOO LATE! CARLOS SAINZ JR AND I WILL TAKE OVER F1, AND YOU CANT DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT ,  
YOU DUMB STINKY BABY!" he said to seb, who really was now a dumb and stinky baby. he was a baby now, and cried and pooped on the bed out of fear because of that .

"ew what the fuck" lewis said in disgust. he no longer cared that it was seb, he cared that this dumb little infant shat on his bed. "i am putting you in a basket and sailing you down a river because i hate babies! good luck you little freak. or should i say GOO GOO GA GA!" he laughed meanly because he hated sab, and then then went and did just that, and then returned to his room, where charles was.

"good thinking sis!" charles said. "now that he's gone, lets hang out!" 

"right on mate! cheers xx" lewis said. and that, is the story of how lewis and charles became best friends.....

TO BE CONTINUED

**Author's Note:**

> none of this was plagiarized! including the summary! this is a 100% natural organic gmo free original work babey!


End file.
